If all else fails, we will simply have to drug our attendants, overpower the guards, raise the oppressed peasants to arms, and take over the government.

When emotion supersedes reason ... gullibility must follow.

No woman really wants a man to carry her off; she only wants him to want to do it.

Dogs can be made to feel guilty about anything, including the sins of their owners. Cats refuse to take the blame for anything - including their own sins.

there is nothing like a garden to rest the soul.

The only way to do it is to do it: by writing, writing, writing.

I knew the answer, and--of course--so did Ramses. He has superb breath control and always gets in ahead of me.

Noble causes have a deplorable effect on the morals of the persons who espouse them.

A man asking for help ought to at least give directions.

Cats always made up to the people who hated them the most. Depending on how you chose to look at it, it was a touching manifestation of trust, or a malicious pleasure in human discomfort.

Martyrdom is often the result of excessive gullibility.

Truth: We are the present. We are now. We are the razor's edge of history. The future flies at us and from that dark blur we shape the past. And the past is forever.

The Owl goes who, who, the Dove goes coo, coo, humans go you! You!

A steely look of anger flared in my mother’s eyes, and I thought, just maybe, I was leaving her in good hands after all. Her own.

If we lost everything except for the clothes we stood up in, would we turn to each other and think....How lucky we really were?

There is only one real happiness in life, and that is the happiness of creating.

It's okay to eat fish because they don't have any feelings.

I try to be honest and I keep moving.

I have an ulcer. It has an IQ of 185.

The only people who need to be "giving back" are thieves, criminals and corrupt individuals that are taking things that are not theirs.

People have expectations of me but I'm not a magician.