I yearn to be a woman of more depth, but I'm not so fond of the path I'd need to follow to get there.

I believe that I have such a vanilla life.

I still believe in the Holy Trinity, except now it's Target, Trader Joe's, and IKEA.

I'm the person who says every single thing she thinks, sometimes to others' amusement, and almost always to my detriment.

No matter how happy anyone is with their choices, I believe it's human nature to wonder about the path not taken.

As a reader, I notice political views regardless of whether or not the book is fiction. What annoys me is when said views do nothing to advance the narrative.

In real life, I tend to yell at people a lot. Not because I'm bossy or mean, but because I'm frustrated.

I don't mean to get all religious here, but I'm pretty sure key lime martinis (with a graham cracker & sugar rim) are proof that Jesus loves us.

Fortunately, all it takes for us to be of one mind is some buttercream frosting.

For the record? I have never been her baby. In fact, I reject the notion of coming out of her body. I prefer to believe I was hatched, or perhaps purchased.

Ambien might have mentally just tossed my salad. WITH CROUTONS.

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.

You don't necessarily equate me with humor!

The worst enemy of truth and freedom in our society is the compact majority.

It is decidedly not true that "nice guys finish last," as that highly original American baseball philosopher, Leo Durocher, was alleged to have said.

God is always at war with sin

One lesson to learn is that the press and the broadcasters are not neutral. And it seems we have to learn it each time there is a dispute: they are actually committed to one side.

A man is a poet if difficulties inherent in his art provide him with ideas; he is not a poet if they deprive him of ideas.

If I had to imagine omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent power in the universe that chose to make my mother suffer, I don't know how I would make that make sense in the universe.

Our true character comes out in the way we pray.

To listen to some devout people, one would imagine that God never laughs.