I know family comes first, but shouldn't that mean after breakfast?

It's always me, isn't it? I'm not really a very nice person, but for some reason it's always me that they come to with their problems.

The key to a happy life is to have accomplishments to be proud of and purpose to look forward to, and at the moment I had both. How wonderful it was to be me.

When faced with people who have very limited conversational skills and no apparent desire to cultivate any it's always easier to simply go along.

Since I am not actually a real human being, my emotional responses are generally limited to what I have learned to fake.

It really is better to be lucky than to be good.

A man who discovers his pants are on fire tends to have very little time to worry about somebody else's box of matches

I mean, really: what kind of person could possibly dislike me?

I had become a perfect fake human, saying the stupid and pointless things that humans say to each other all day long.

Of course it was a terrible thing, and the world would be a much better place without someone in it who could do that, but did that mean we had to miss lunch?

There are still very few laws against thinking, although I am sure they're working hard on that in Washington.

If I get an idea for a series that I really like, I'm sure I won't be able to resist coming back and doing it.

Real intelligence must be fiercely capable of investigating every aspect of existence, including the very process of knowledge that we call science .

Corporate crime kills far more people and costs taxpayers far more money than street crime.

To wash and dress a corpse is a far different thing from making it alive: Man can do the one--God alone can do the other.

Machines don't use machines.

This would be a vastly better world to live in if Matt Drudge decided to handle his emotional problems more responsibly, and set himself on fire.

Master the season's spot-on style with polka dot sweatpants and a must-have denim trench.

Under this fine rain I breathe in the innocence of the world. I feel coloured by the nuances of infinity. At this moment I am one with my picture. We are an iridescent chaos.

If I think, I am lost.

Mind is something unnatural; it never becomes your natural state. But meditation is a natural state - which we have lost.