I always knew that I wanted to work on my own material - something that would be more long-lasting than short-lived electronic transmissions.

One of the marks of a truly great mind, I had discovered, is the ability to feign stupidity on demand.

Anyone who knew the word slattern was worth cultivating as a friend.

If poisons were ponies, I'd put my money on cyanide.

The spectrum on the list is very broad. It includes leftists who think that whiny liberals should be stuffed in a sack and drowned.

As I stood outside in Cow Lane, it occurred to me that Heaven must be a place where the library is open twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. No ... eight days a week.

Whenever I'm out-of-doors and find myself wanting to have a first-rate think, I fling myself down on my back, throw my arms and legs out so that I look like an asterisk, and gaze at the sky.

Chicken fizz! O Lord, protect all of us who toil in the vineyards of experimental chemistry!

Compared with my life Cinderella was a spoiled brat.

I'm at that age where I watch such things with two minds, one that cackles at these capers and another that never gets much beyond a rather jaded and self-conscious smile, like the Mona Lisa.

Although it is pleasant to think about poison at any season, there is something special about Christmas, and I found myself grinning.

This world has been changing from time immemorial. But because it is “round” (subject to cycle of cause-effect), one cannot find an end to it.

You taste so good. I love making you come with my mouth.” —Bryce Van Der Linden (French Kiss, Unbearable Passion, #2)

What is your one-sentence job description?

I am searching for abstract ways of expressing reality, abstract forms that will enlighten my own mystery.

It enhances our sense of the grand security and serenity of nature to observe the still undisturbed economy and content of the fishes of this century, their happiness a regular fruit of the summer.

A house should look lived in, and I consider it clean as long as I don't stick to it and it doesn't give me cholera.

Cause if there's one thing Islamic terrorists don't have is....(seriously thinking about it)....%#@&!

False principles, which correspond with the bad as well as with the just aspirations of mankind, are a normal and necessary element in the social life of nations.

He [P.G.Wodehouse] is I believe, the only man living who speaks with equal fluency the American and English languages.