Hitchhiking, intrinsically, is sexual and dangerous. At the same time I never really felt scared. I was scared that nobody would pick me up and that I'd be waiting by the side of the road for a week.

It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else.

Don’t sleep with people who don’t read.

My idea of an interesting person is someone who is quite proud of their seemingly abnormal life and turns their disadvantage into a career.

True success is figuring out your life and career so you never have to be around jerks.

Without obsession, life is nothing.

[My catholic education] sticked with me. It caused the rage I had to make 'Pink Flamingos.'

Being rich is not about how much money you have or how many homes you own; it's the freedom to buy any book you want without looking at the price and wondering if you can afford it.

Do we secretly idolize our imagined opposites, yearning to become the role models for others we know we could never be for ourselves?

I like hard movies; I like ones that are basically the opposite of a date movie.

The "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" hitchhiker really made people never want to hitchhike again - the hitcher, the show. Hitchhiking is always vaguely sexual.

If achieving a desired goal was easy why would anyone bother. There'd be no fun.

It is impossible to say why people put so little value on complete happiness.

I can't leave her now. I like her too much. There, I said it. But I won't say it again.

Party leads to vicious, corrupt and unprofitable legislation, for the sole purpose of defeating party.

Among the most urgent political priorities of our age is the separation of economy and state.

If I can finish a cartoon in 20 minutes, then that's the ideal editorial cartoon - it's to the point.

Ultimately we're all responsible for putting our belief into action.

Time must be explicitly managed, like money.

A conflagration always made such a nice backdrop to a battle. Fire made everything so much more joyously apocalyptic.

I was born free as Caesar; so were you