Hearing Mass is the ceremony I most favor during my travels. Church is the only place where someone speaks to me and I do not have to answer back.

Patriotism is when love of your own people comes first; nationalism, when hate for people other than your own comes first.

How can anyone govern a nation that has two hundred and forty-six different kinds of cheese?

Always choose the hardest way, on it you will not find opponents

I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.

Silence is the ultimate weapon of power.

In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate.

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.

Deliberation is the work of many men. Action, of one alone.

You have to be fast on your feet and adaptive or else a strategy is useless.

He who laughs last didn't get the joke.

Sometimes you have to succeed to see that there is nothing awesome in the thing which will be achieved!

intuition is always right in at least two important ways

Heroic dreams are the consolation of the unhappy. After all, when people like us say we're being heroic, it usually means we're about to kill each other--or kill ourselves.

Some critics of my work took the view that a satirist should defer to the finer feelings of his readers and respect widely held beliefs.

If it weren't for received ideas, the publishing industry wouldn't have any ideas at all.

Joan Rivers broke down barriers, advocated for free speech, and never apologized for who she was.

I think imperfections are important, just as mistakes are important. You only get to be good by making mistakes, and you only get to be real by being imperfect.

I have always heard, Sancho, that doing good to base fellows is like throwing water into the sea.

When I think of a good restaurant, it's where the food has been consistent; there's always a consistency.

Who knows what we’ll need to learn thirty years from now? We do know that we will need to be good at searching for information, collating it, and figuring out whether it is right or wrong.