America is an incredibly polarized country politically. I think ANY Republican would start out with 42 percent of the vote.

I believe that the fragile-flower, idea-intolerant society of victimhood that is being cultivated in many colleges today is really bad.

Mostly, you become a writer not because you want to get rich or famous, but because you have to write; because there is something inside that must come out.

The verb "Garland" should be created. It would mean to unfairly put a stinking albatross around someone's neck, to make him unemployable.

The horrifying thing is that nearly half of America seems in synch with xenophobia and race-baiting.

Editorials are editorials. They a supposed to have an opinion, even a very strong one.

The one thing an aspiring writer must understand is that it's hard. If you think it's not hard, you're not doing it right.

I once found myself driving, smoking a cigar, taking notes, and talking on the phone at the same time. I only became completely aware of this when I had to shift, and realized something had to give.

One thing I am learning from the kitten is that everything he is doing seems to be in preparation for murder.

I think Marco Rubio could never have recovered from revealing himself to be pathetic.

Every single fat comic uses his weight as a punchline. There is something sad about that.

The secret of a good old age is simply an honorable pact with solitude.

You know, sometimes the right thing isn’t the thing you think is right. It’s the wrong thing you’re afraid to think of.

Little do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.

Being wealthy is often a powerful predictor that people spend less time doing pleasurable things and more time doing compulsory things and feeling stressed.

I will walk where my own nature would be leading.

Sometimes we are lucky enough to know that our lives have been changed, to discard the old, embrace the new, and run headlong down an immutable course

The question of the composition of perceptible objects is one which already occupied the mind of the ancient Greeks.

He is a fine friend. He stabs you in the front.

Well, then, do it then, boy.

To be a good hitter you've got to do one thing - get a good ball to hit.