A lot of people are too easily offended. Religious people, for instance. They've been offending other people for centuries.

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!

I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.

A woman's mind is as complex as the contents of her handbag; even when you get to the bottom of it, there is ALWAYS something at the bottom to surprise you!

So, have you heard about the oyster who went to a disco and pulled a mussel?

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.

There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.

The desire to be a politician should bar you for life from ever being one.

I think age is terribly overrated. You're okay as long as you don't grow up. By all means grow old, but don't mature. Remain childlike, retain wonder, the ability to be flabbergasted by something.

Life is supposed to be fun. It's not a job or occupation. We're here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh.

Everybody was dying, or already dead, or leaving other people, and the year was dying into winter, and the only thing to do was make some noise.

We all talk to ourselves. A major key to success exists in what we say to ourselves, which helps to shape our attitude and mindset.

But as far as the concept of HAL, who HAL was, his character - I had no role in creating him.

I've known people with exceptional talent - and some have wasted it. Ambition spurs a man on.

We must never try to escape the obligation of living at our best.

making final judgements about poets, cities or regions on the basis of an anthology is always dangerous: anthologies are mirages created, finally, by their editors.

The whole thing with eastern music and instruments, I love all that stuff.

I'm very involved with PETA - People for Ethical Treatment of Animals - and Greenpeace and a lot of women's shelter and clothing giveaways.

To state a lie firmly, categorically and with great authority, undeterred by the fact that all concerned know it to be a lie, is one of the principal activities defined by the term practising law.

After Richmond, we went to Dover and tested that week at Kentucky. I was going to Dover and we had to get the trainer to meet us at the airport. I had to do some therapy on my ribs they hurt so bad.