A child is a person who can't understand why someone would give away a perfectly good kitten.

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success.

I don’t go back and look at my early work, because the last time I did, many years ago, it left me cringing. If one publishes, then one is creating a public record of Learning to Write.

Not accustomed to entertaining angels, are we?” he asked.

Justice is blind, but judges have eyes.

It is still true that it is easier to compose a poem in the form of a manual for adjusting a VCR than it is to write a piece using just tuning as a symphony.

Drugs support terrorism? No, your SUV supports terrorism.

The method of Fluxions is the general key by help whereof the modern mathematicians unlock the secrets of Geometry, and consequently of Nature.

A life worth living is a life worth recording.

A lot of the best work I've ever done started out as something completely different because I gave myself permission to have space around my time and expectations.

It is much easier not to write like a man than to write like a woman.

I have to admit that Christina is good—though I don’t like giving credit to Candor smart-mouths—and so is Peter—though I don’t like giving credit to future psychopaths.