Wit Quotes

What is perfectly true is perfectly witty.

Your wits make others witty.

Insanity destroys reason, but not wit.

'T is an old maxim in the schools, That flattery 's the food of fools; Yet now and then your men of wit Will condescend to take a bit.

To aspire to be superhuman is a most discreditable admission that you lack the guts, the wit, the moderating judgment to be successfully and consummately human.

Writings may be compared to wine. Sense is the strength, but wit the flavor.

Neither have they hearts to stay, nor wit enough to run away.

Baby girl you need to stop it, all that pride and self esteem got you angry bout this girl I'm wit in all them magazines.

The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.

Wine works the heart up, wakes the wit, There is no cure 'gainst age but it

If a man's wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics; for in demonstrations, if his wit be called away never so little, he must begin again.

Farewell, woman! I intend Henceforth every night to sit With my lewd, well-natured friend, Drinking to engender wit.

It doesn't phaze, I amaze wit my phrases Play this in your Jeep, so your neighbors lose some sleep (I wanna thank you)

[On a dull party:] It was a fête worse than death.

On some days you get what you want, and on others, you get what you need.

I am a mediocre being, a bit cunning.

I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know.

Yeah, well, wish in one hand, crap in the other, and see which fills up first

There’s a fine line between support and stalking and let’s all stay on the right side of that.

Wit is an explosion of the compound spirit.

For those with drive, wit, vision, ego and a masochistic outlook, there is always room.

I'll be there for you, I will care for you, I keep thinking you just don't know. Tryna run from that, say you're done wit that, on your face girl it just don't show.

He who cannot shine by thought, seeks to bring himself into notice by a witticism.

Every thing in this world, said my father, is big with jest,--and has wit in it, and instruction too,--if we can but find it out.

Wit is the flower of the imagination.

Coffee falls into the stomach... ideas begin to move, things remembered arrive at full gallop... the shafts of wit start up like sharp-shooters, similes arise, the paper is covered with ink...

What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his doublet and hose and leaves off his wit!

Education always continues. We all know that beauty fades, but what stays is a person's personality, their sense of humor, their wit, what they're interested in. That's what really shines.

The physician must have at his command a certain ready wit, as dourness is repulsive both to the healthy and the sick.

[Allegory] is a flight by which the human wit attempts at one and the same time to investigate two objects, and consequently is fitted only to the most exalted geniuses.

What is an epigram? A dwarfish whole, its body brevity, and wit its soul.

Come Sleep! Oh Sleep, the certain knot of peace, the baiting-place of wit, the balm of woe, the poor man's wealth, the prisoner's release, the indifferent judge between the high and low.

They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.

As the fertilest ground, must be manured, so must the highest flying wit have a Daedalus to guide him.

Commend a fool for his wit, or a rogue for his honesty and he will receive you into his favour.

It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.

He is a first-rate collector who can, upon all occasions, collect his wits.

I like a very dry wit, not the big kind of humor like Robin Williams. I don't think I'm capable of that.

I never have wit until I am below stairs. [Fr., Je n'ai jamais d'esprit qu'au bas de l'escalier.]

We pay just as dearly for our triumphs as we do for our defeats. Go ahead and fail. But fail with wit, fail with grace, fail with style. A mediocre failure is as insufferable as a mediocre success.

A pun is not bound by the laws which limit nicer wit. It is a pistol let off at the ear; not a feather to tickle the intellect.

There is a certain majesty in simplicity which is far above all the quaintness of wit.

He is winding the watch of his wit; by and by it will strike.

If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

Every little action of the common day makes or unmakes character.

A witty saying proves nothing.

Marriage is the grave or tomb of wit.

The great charm of conversation consists less in the display of one's own wit and intelligence than in the power to draw forth the resources of others.

Wit must be foiled by wit: cut a diamond with a diamond.

New technologies make it possible for even the mass marketer to assume the role of a small proprietor, doing business again wit individuals, one at a time.