Funny Quotes
The simile has to match the tone of its surroundings and has to be like a little joke. Writing a simile that isn't funny on some level is quite hard.
I like how you don't hide your problems like everyone else, and I don't have to hide mine when I'm around you.
I don't want to die ... I don't want to die poor. Two great motivators in the history of human cultures.
Bod quite liked crows. He thought they were funny and he liked the way they helped to keep the graveyard tidy.
The young woman was crying, in the way that grownups cry, keeping it inside as much as they can, and hating it when it still pushes out at the edges, making them ugly and funny-looking on the way.
'Chappie' would be like 'RoboCop,' but hilarious. If you mixed 'Robocop' with 'E.T.' and it was... funny, that's what it is.
There's this art form in songwriting that's incredibly difficult - to be really funny in a song and also really touching. I can't do that.
I'm not very interesting. Birds are interesting. I could stand there lip-synching all day long, but it would feel funny, and people would be able to tell. I'm not a good actress.
I'm 27. I feel like I get it. I'm OK with being sexy if I feel like it. Some days I'm brainy, some days I'm funny, some days I'm sexy, and sometimes, I just want to dance.
There's been a lot of coming home in the early mornings after funny nights out, having bizarre sandwiches in bed.
Scream" was great for what it was. For a horror film, it was intelligent, it was funny, it took a laugh at itself.
Everyone forgets that what's fun about a romantic comedy is how these two people are going to fight with each other and how's that going to be funny.
Because also, sometimes things that are really funny on the day, when you look at them in post can feel too broad, you know? Sometimes not, but it's kind of weird how that can change.
When I write something, it's usually 'cause I think it's funny or I have a way in, but when I direct something, I really need to be close to it.
Yes, the fans are going to get their money's worth. It's like...and everything on there is funny. It's not like random crap they put in a movie. I think it's all very funny, so.
Wikipedia is just an incredible thing. It is fact-encirclingly huge, and it is idiosyncratic, careful, messy, funny, shocking and full of simmering controversies - and it is free, and it is fast.
I'd love to do a film with Mariah. But it would have to be a comedy. She's the funniest woman in the world, she just cracks me up all the time.
I don't know, maybe Australian humour isn't supposed to be funny. It's as dry as the Sahara, and I think people miss that.
A lot of people who do drama say comedy is the hardest thing, but, not wanting to sound like a bighead, comedy is easy for me, as I've always been fairly funny.
My friends and family always thought I was pretty funny, but I don't know if they thought I was get-my-own-show funny.
Before people figured out I was funny, I got cast quite a bit as either a rapist or serial killer or the guy who catches those people.
I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation.
It's funny, growing up there was never anybody around me with any kind of artistic bent.
It's so funny - my mom when I am dating someone new, all she will get is the name, first and last, and within an hour, I will get an entire life report of the person.
I was told I had a two per cent chance of getting pregnant, so I say she's a two per cent baby.
I don't have a desire to do reality. Because my truth is not what people are responding to. My truth is funny; I laugh with my husband every day.
I think the first rule of comedy is that it has to be funny and I find a lot of the broad comedy which is sent to me, painfully unfunny.
If I could go into the woods and kill a bear myself, I'd wear it proudly as a trophy.
And, in a funny way, each death is different and you mourn each death differently and each death brings back the death you mourned earlier and you get into a bit of a pile-up.
I try to write 'and it's all very funny' after each scene description so that the reader can imagine the movie in their head.
I get a lot of responses to my movies. Some people say, 'Oh, I thought it was really funny - I hope that's okay!' And my answer always is 'Yes. It's totally okay.'
I have always been very fond of them (drama critics) . . . I think it is so frightfully clever of them to go night after night to the theatre and know so little about it.
When I was a little kid I always wanted to be ginger. My best friend was ginger and he was pretty cool.
When I was a little kid I wanted to be Face. I thought, cos I had blond hair and he did too, that when I grew up I'd look like him.
I don't like John Terry and I never have. He's got funny eyes and he's a cry baby. He's also a Cockney.
How's it going down there?" "It's weird. They're too polite, they talk funny, and stuff has too much shine on it. But the coffee's worse than Central's, so that's something.
I've just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn't know them, I wouldn't know they were funny from the television. I don't know what it does, it just sucks it away.
If you wagered $5,000 on each of my winning NFL picks in 2012 and $500 ($550) on each of my losing picks, you'd be ahead $70,050. Wow.
Nate Silver is now forecasting Oscar winners. The only area of life in which he has no expertise, ironically, is life itself.
America has become so tense and nervous it has been years since I have seen anyone sleep in church - and that is a sad situation.
