Funny Quotes
A lot of things run through your head when you're going in to relieve in a tight spot. One of them was, "Should I spike myself?"
Horror films are very functional like comedies. The main thing with a comedy, the big question is "is it funny?" And with horror the question is "is it scary?"
In this world, everyone wants to know everything about you, and I think that's funny.
You can pay attention to the fact, in which case you'll probably become a mathematician, or you can ignore it, in which case you'll probably become a physicist.
It's funny, I never considered that people are going to see me on the show and maybe stop me on the subway.
I've never directed before, so I need to make sure that people know that I can. The movie that I've written, 'The Sophisticates,' is a... small ensemble comedy and I hope it's charming and funny.
When we were younger, my cousins used to jump in front of cars with masks on and start dancing really funny or making funny moves and the people in the cars would start laughing.
Shakespeare wrote great plays that we're still watching all these years later. Charlie Chaplin made great comedies and they are still as funny today as they ever were.
I love comedy. I'm not known for comedy, but I love it. I've done a lot of it, in my lifetime. But most people are surprised to hear that I made a funny movie.
What I would do in order to be popular was, I'd put myself on line and joke around and be funny, and I was always known as the crazy kid.
Hemingway seems to be in a funny position. People nowadays can't identify with him closely as a member of their own generation, and he isn't yet historical.
About as close you can get to the perfect cerebral thriller: searingly smart, ridiculously funny, and fast as hell... I defy anybody to read the first page and not keep going to the last.
I don't believe pumpkin pie is even made from pumpkin. I mean, how can something that smells that shitty make a pie so sweet? There's not enough sugar in the universe.
This book is dedicated to all of my friends who helped me get to where I am today - you know who you are... and when I find you I am going to kill you.
Well first of all, I'd just like to say that 2005 was a great year, if you like swimming through crap.
Kids seem to get me when I play colleges - they like it because I go after them. They'll come up after and say I am like their dads, only funny.
It’s funny how life can change so much but still nothing changes at all. Or maybe it’s that life changes, but you as a person don’t or maybe we adjust, but don’t actually change.
I love 'Saturday Night Live,' and it's such a funny show. I don't know if I'm funny enough to be on it but definitely would be interested in doing it.
Shirley MacLaine said, You're so funny, then gave me a hug. Everything went white. I couldn't hear, I couldn't see. I thought I was going to pass out
Grand Slams are funny things. You have to try to find a way to get through the first week and put yourself in a position in the second week. A lot of strange things happen.
Comedy is not commercial; it is risky, because what is funny in one place isn't always funny somewhere else.
I am one of the unpraised, unrewarded millions without whom Statistics would be a bankrupt science. It is we who are born, who marry, who die, in constant ratios.
There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.
Remember that the wit, humour, and jokes of most mixed companies are local. They thrive in that particular soil, but will not often bear transplanting.
Sexual intercourse is a grossly overrated pastime; the position is undignified, the pleasure momentary and the consequences damnable.
A funny line can never exist on its own. It needs to be surrounded by mood and circumstances.
I was always the funny-looking girl. I couldn't compete with the Brazilian girls. My nose is off, my ears are too big. But I think it's my personality that these designers were drawn to.
Sorry - Americans only buy things that come from suffering. They just enjoy it more when they know someone's getting hurt.
To me, comedies are usually the least funny movies. Movies that are actually a comedy are usually not all that funny. To me Goodfellas and Raging Bull are two of the funniest movies I ever saw.
I always find it funny when I watch actors talking about, "I chose to do this part." A lot of times it's you're lucky to get the job. We're like, "Thank you so much."
I always remember loving Even Stevens - that show was so brilliant and funny and smart.
I have a crush on Steve Tyler. He's funny, he rocks, and has a voice like a god. There is another one who I have discovered can sing. I should try and make an album with him... it's Barack Obama!
Woman: You certainly know the way to a man's heart. Mae West: Funny, too, 'cause I don't know how to cook.
The drama school was in Oxford - and it's funny to think of it, but in those days when I started out the University was nearly all male. And they certainly weren't mixed.
I try to think of something catchy to say, but there's nothing but irritation that something that was funny yo an eleven-year-old boy is still funny to a seventeen-year-old one.