Funny But True Quotes
Funny But True Quote of the day
To err is human, to forgive is against company policy.
If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?
I am not sure if women are attracted to genius. Can you imagine the wise wizard winning the woman over the gallant swordsman? It seems rather otherworldly in more ways than one.
I did what all good Iriah dads do when faced with a worthy adversary..I said Ask your mother!!
Somewhere in the crowd was at least one potential friend who'd understand the fundamental value of goofing off. Because if not, how boring would that be?
Flattery does not encourage the perfect flow of love in the vein of your relationship. Be genuine and speak out what you feel for each other without hiding the painful truth.
With a philosophy education, one can infuriate his peers, intimidate his date, think of obscure, unreliable ways to make money, and never regret a thing.
The logic behind patriotism is a mystery. At least a man who believes that his own family or clan is superior to all others is familiar with more than 0.000003% of the people involved.
She shuddered. “What is it with slobbery kissers? Are they trying to drown us in spit? I mean, Jesus, swallow every now and then.
One of the Christian's biggest fears is appearing 'too Christian'. God forbid, because that's often characterized as god-awful! We want to be one, but without being 'one of them'.
It is better to doubt that a concept is stupidly flying under your head than profoundly flying over your head.
I enjoy poetry where I can talk as bizarre as I please, but theology or philosophy, I always respect the truth by taking it a step further.
Some things are so silly they have a certain brilliance to them. Other things, set as standards for brilliance and therefore exalted by many who don't know why, become tarnished because of it.
Even though I dislike being kicked by others, I do enjoy the feeling of kicking others
To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it.
Tolerance! The virtue that makes one bite his tongue so that he can tear out his hair.
Never take advice about never taking advice. That is an old vice of men - to dish it out without being able to take it - the blind leading the blind into more blindness.
The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you.
We men are fascinated by the things we don't really understand. It gives us something to think and talk about: like females, they drive us nuts.
I feel as though whenever I create something, my Mr. Hyde wakes up in the middle of the night and starts thrashing it. I sometimes love it the next morning, but other times it is an abomination.
If I were to vote, I would intentionally vote for the goofiest candidate. It is my theory that when the people can outwit the leader, the more respected their voices will be.
Psychobabble attempts to redefine the entire English language just to make a correct statement incorrect. Psychology is the study of why someone would try to do this.
Whenever you feel like feeling like a devil's advocate, Bible-thump. That, in a worldly world, is the great irony and satire of evangelism.
To claim that one can never live a positive life with a negative mind is a very negative claim to make!
Wisdom of the Ages: "Valentine's Day" Because she never forgets, especially if you do.
It's always funny that you can try and try again to steal all your critics' ammo, predict their responses, but no matter what, they'll still have a water gun stashed somewhere.
Children throw tantrums because they've imagined their 'father in heaven' does so. And because, their inherited religious book has, in written, shown them so.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.' But eating too many, is quite enough-plenty. And you'll have to go see the good doc anyway.
i realize you cant just throw real gems at ppl...because they think cubic zirconia is the real thing lol
Well sue me for staring. I'd be willing to scrub away my shame on his washboard abs.
No, " said the cat. "Now, you people have names. That's because you don't know who you are. We know who we are, so we don't need names.
I'm past competing in pissing contests. My jet stream is now more of a trickle. The only contest I'd win is the number of trips to the bathroom it takes to purge a 32oz soda.
I do not want to sound cynical or condescending, but your lips are moving, your mind unbending.
I have only one heart to give and one mind to lose. May I someday find a woman who will take them both.
I don't know. I don't really like old movies. The acting is so, 'Hey buddy, ol' pal. Let's go wear our hats and have a big misunderstanding
Gomst's mouth framed a 'no', but every other muscle in him said 'yes'. You'd think priests would be better liars, what with their jobs and all.
