Comedy Quotes
If you can feed in the presence of your enemies, if you can be blessed under the weight of burdens, when you praise God in pain, it is preparation for provision.
When you do away with God you become your own god, because you recognise no greater power in the universe than yourself.
I have graduated to the extent of not asking what is happening in my life because I trust the maker(God).
I have my priorities and I know my purpose. I do not Praise God because of my pain but I praise Him because of what the pain is producing.
When you praise God in pain, it is preparing you for provision.
The things I call crisis and all the things that were coming after me are all coming to serve the purpose of God in my life.
Learn to eat with your enemies all around you but most of all thank God for his presence. Keep your eyes fixed to the presence of God in the presence of your enemies.
I have learned to thank God for what I cannot see, I have learned to trust God with what I cannot.
You will always end up in frustration whenever you try to produce outside your purpose.
God's perspectives requires persistence. To have God's perspective in the world we live in requires persistence.
Have you ever asked yourself this question "what can God do through me?" The preacher has no platform if the people has no sense of mission.
I don't just have only the peace of God, I do also have a God who gives peace, not just resources but the revelation of His presence.
God wants to use you right where you are with what you have not what you do not have.
Some people want to kill goliath but they do not want to attend to sheep. How can God use you to kill giants if you cannot follow simple instructions?
Sometimes we want God to use us to do big things when we would not even want to do the basics.
You can't disappoint what God has appointed.
If you can't see the assets in you, it will be hard for you to export it to the world. Recognise who you are and the world will recognise you.
In God's presence I find peace that is much deeper than any disappointment. I will grow and I understand I can't grow myself, that is why I need God and His grace.
Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees, begging for my life.
For 3 million you could give everyone in Scotland a shovel, and we could dig a hole so deep we could hand her over to Satan in person. (on Margaret Thatcher)
I wanted to play with death, like a child with a new toy, I wanted to push all the buttons and see what would happen.
We tend to get a little information before we off people. It’s not a play by ear sort of deal.
Adam pressed his hand to his face. Sighed. "Right. It's just that… He died. And I'm so freaking pissed off, I swear I'd punch him in the face if he were standing right here.
That's the problem with best friends. Sometimes they know you better than you know yourself.
Many obese people spend a significant amount of their energy on suppressing the urge to tell some of the people who are staring at them that they do not eat as much and as frequently as they seem to.
Most sane human beings who are over the age of six usually act or react not as per what they genuinely feel or really think but in accordance with the expectations of those around them.
What did you do before?” “I used to run a lot.”“Cross country? Track?”“From the cops, actually.
Some of us were brought into this troubled world primarily or only to increase our fathers’ chances of not being left by our mothers, or vice versa.
Greed is a contagious mental illness without which civilization as we know it would not have been possible.
Just like how most if not all poor boys look up to and aspire to someday be rich men, most if not all underdeveloped and developing countries look up to and aspire to someday be developed countries.
The last time everyone loved or at least liked everyone was when the world had a population of about 4.
In reality most human beings are not, to most human beings, more important than money.
Although they probably know that some children were used and some children are used as miners, most adults are ignorant of the chocolate industry’s use of minors.
There is nothing morally wrong with buying stolen goods, unless you know that they were stolen.
Loneliness tortures many if not most of the elderly more intensely and more frequently than it torments many if not most of us who will never be or have not yet been pushed or pulled into old age.
As an unavoidable result of the inevitable loss of some physical and/or some mental abilities, many a man who has been alive for many years has become a boy again.
Life is a process during which one initially gets less and less dependent, independent, and then more and more dependent.
Some people avoid thinking deeply in public, only because they are afraid of coming across as suicidal.
Some people hate people who are overconfident, only because their overconfidence reminds them of their underconfidence.
A premature death does not only rob one of the countless instances where one would have experienced pleasure, it also saves one from the innumerable instances where one would have experienced pain.
Boredom is probably more frequent and more tormenting if you do not have sight or hands.
In some cases, you can tell how somebody is being treated by their own boss from the way they are treating someone to whom they are a boss.
A relationship is likely to last way longer, if each partner convinces or has convinced themselves that they do not deserve their partner, even if that is not true.
Adults who use big words in order to seem intelligent are annoying, especially those who are not intelligent.
Most of us cling to life as if our existence were a result of our deed or choice.
