T.C. Boyle Quotes

Stephen Hawking: Brainier than Kurt Cobain's garage wall.

The thing I don't get about paedophilia... Why the hell do kids find old men in dirty raincoats so sexy?

Nothing is impossible. It can be downright difficult, but not impossible.

But then, that's the beauty of writing stories-each one is an exploratory journey in search of a reason and a shape. And when you find that reason and that shape, there's no feeling like it.

I don't want people to sit there and objectively watch the film. I want them to experience it as something that's under their skin, so you try to make the films really tactile.

The East End of Glasgow is like the Olympics. Lots of foriegners in tracksuits struggling to speak English.

The average life expectancy rate in some parts of Glasgow is 54. If you've ever been there, you'll realize that that's maybe a bit long.

Singing for royalty is a dream of mine - I'd absolutely love to sing for the Queen at the Royal Variety Show. All the contestants are very good. I will just have to do my best and see what happens.

Anonymity is the fame of the future.

I think myself obliged, whatever my private apprehensions may be of the success, to do my duty, and leave events to their Disposer.

The professorial dictum has always been to write what you know, but I say write what you don't know and find something out. And it works.

We're convinced we need money to have friends and partners, but actually I've found the opposite to be true.

Half the lies our opponents tell about us are untrue.

I think it's wrong to think of economics as money. The actual word itself actually revolves around meeting one's needs. Money is one way of meeting our needs, but it's only one way.

Art should be waged like war.

If you have to be persuaded about something, you shouldn't do it.

I like to work for a while, and then do nothing for some period.

I want people to leave the cinema feeling that something's been confirmed for them about life.

I want to trace my father, could you suggest a good marker pen?

Does anyone find it ironic how a program aimed at old people is called 'Countdown'?

Does anyone actually think that Beckham knows he's in America? I think he just follows a football and all he notices is that it occasionally gets warmer.

Opera? Just what the world needs: more fat women screaming.

Disappointment is the nurse of wisdom.

I gave my girlfriend something she didn't expect for Valentine's day... Chlamydia.

When I heard Cristiano Ronaldo was pictured holding a manbag, I was surprised it was a gucci bag and not another guy's sack.

... the constructive power of an image is not measured in terms of its truth, but of the love it inspires.

The owners of a dog which swallowed a diamond worth £12000 had to wait three days until it re-emerged. With a bit of planning it could have been a nice way to propose.

Be silent and safe-silence never betrays you.

Our minorities alone are in a position to know what the fathers of our democracy were talking about.

I spent every day just praying that I didn't look like a big dork on camera.

I needed to stop eating sweeties and cakes. It's the bane of my life. I had to lose the weight for my health.

If Harry Potter's so magical, why cant he cure his own eyesight and get laid. A teenage lad shouldnt need a broomstick to cling onto.

At present there are such goings-on that everything is at a standstill.

Sometimes when you're just thrown into something, you are more ready for it than when you have time to think it over and get nervous about it.

I don't know how long i could be a vet before i got bored and started shagging stuff.

Victoria Beckham looks like she has a dump once every four years. That's probably how David knows that there's a World Cup coming up.

Every pint bottle should contain a quart.

Female beauties are as fickle in their faces as in their minds; though casualties should spare them, age brings in a necessity of decay.

He that said it was not good for man to be alone, placed the celibate amongst the inferior states of perfection.

Let me ask you a question. How long is too long to text someone back? My wife still thinks I died in 9/11.

I love fast cars... and to go too fast in them.

She comes from the Midwest. She had me at a very young age and raised me on her own. She's a very hard worker.

Ah, trouble, trouble, there are the two different kinds ... there's the one you give and the other you take.

Doubt is brother-devil to Despair.

Being Irish was a big thing for me, particularly growing up in Chicago.

Put least trust in him who is foremost to praise you, nor judge of a road till it draw to the end.

The English are worried about the Euro being brought in because of loss of national identity and rising prices. In Scotland, people are just worried in case they have to close Poundstretcher.

I think I couldn't do what I do [live without money] without studying economics, because you need to understand the system first - how it currently works - in order to change it.

I didn't think it would be possible, but it appears Isiah Thomas is a worse general manager than coach.

I think that's the key [of communication] - to not use one method of communication for all people.