You've got to try and do your best, and the failure is what's funny. But you can't be aware of the failure, you've just got to keep trying to do your best.

I was genuinely starstruck when I met Kermit the Frog. Like many stars here tonight, he's a lot shorter in real life.

There are a lot of good shows that don't get picked up. Like that Ben Stiller pilot, Heat Vision And Jack? That would have been a great show, but somehow it slipped by.

My acting's very understated. I think my sad and happy don't play that differently onscreen.

It's easy to struggle in New York. I think New York is a bit expensive.

I think the radio is kind of cool, because you're really free to do whatever you want, because you can go into another world. Whereas in TV, you have to make that world.

I'm easy to get along with, and intolerant.

At the end of your life, you're lucky if you die.

Now it looks like I'll be known as the musical comedy guy. Which is good news for me. Or I'll be known as the New Zealand idiot.

I don't know, man. Look at me. I've changed. I've grown up. I've got a job, got a career ... I drink coffee now.

I definitely miss New Zealand. Mainly friends and family.

You are all a lost generation, " Gertrude Stein said to Hemingway. We weren't lost. We knew where we were, all right, but we wouldn't go home. Ours was the generation that stayed up all night.

Here's one prophecy the writer can make - you'll never be rich and you'll probably be poor.

Boxing is smoky halls and kidneys battered until they bleed.

We know not of the future and cannot plan for it much.

Are you satisfied being filled with good information about God, or do you long to burst into His manifest presence?

Every woman is insecure, no matter how beautiful they are.

I hunted all through the four Gospels trying to find one of Christ's funeral sermons, but I couldn't find any. I found He broke up every funeral He ever attended! Death couldn't exist where He was.

It is my feeling that Time ripens all things; with Time all things are revealed; Time is the father of truth.

There is no definition of a mental disorder. It's bullshit. I mean, you just can't define it.

To all the girls that think you’re fat because you’re not a size zero, you’re the beautiful one, its society who’s ugly.