When you talk about George Burns you're talking about a living legend . . . well, a legend, anyhow.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

Some people say funny things - but I say things funny.

Right now we are here, and nothing can mar our perfection, or steal the joy of this perfect moment.

But freedom starts with honesty. We aren’t doing ourselves any favors by defining our- selves as good and others as bad. Let’s just agree that we all need help, that we are all in this together.

Life is not like a novel, but a novel can be like life. The best ones always are.

This is how memories are made... by going with the flow.

When God places a burden upon you, He places His arms underneath you.

I don't work so hard at trying to get every song to be three-dimensional and mean so much. I just want to breathe, right now, with the music.

The world is futile when viewed through the persona of the body. The body is not simply the physical body but it's the body of knowledge of this world.

Fear must be entirely banished. The purified soul will fear nothing.

Where was the middle ground between a sense of adventure and just plain sense?

[N]or should you move so fast! The works of God do not proceed in that way; they come about of themselves, and those He does not create soon perish.