When you're 20 you can put a ton of old-age prosthetics on and be an old guy, but when you're 70 you can't play a 20-year-old.

My daughter got me a 'World's Best Dad' mug. So we know she's sarcastic.

If you're committed enough, you can make any story work. I once told a woman I was Kevin Costner, and it worked because I believed it.

We're all real people with moments of intense honesty and pathos and humanity. We all experience that, whether you're comedic or not.

You say you're going to be the pope, become the pope.

Don't say you're going to stop eating red meat when you like red meat.

If you surround me with darkness, suddenly, I am "somewhat fun."

Everybody needs some good sketch comedy.

We don't feel constrained by what we did in the past.

The world needs less destruction.

The laugh is what trumps everything.

Non-praying is lawlessness discord anarchy.

My early business ventures included growing Christmas trees and breeding birds.

America is a country that seems forever to be toddler or teenager, at those two stages of human development characterized by conflict between autonomy and security.

I just put my feet in the ground and move them around.

All the survivors of the war had reached their homes and so put the perils of battle and the sea behind them.

I do not say that all men are equal in their ability, character and motivation. I do say that every American should be given a fair chance to develop all the talents they may have.

The message from the moon which we have flashed to the far corners of this planet is that no problem need any longer be considered insoluble.

[On Venice:] Every hour of the day is a miracle of light. In summer with daybreak the rising sun produces such a tender magic on the water that it nearly breaks one's heart.

Why are my least favorite people always the most durable?

the best people have the rottenest luck