What I love about New York: the faster and more recklessly my cab driver drives the safer and all around better I feel.

Sometimes standing up for what you believe means standing down and allowing the universe to do its work.

Politicians study hard and work diligently their entire lives to be able to stand in front of a national audience and lie through their teeth.

The bigger the words the weaker the voice.

To find meaning in our lives we need consistent exposure to kids, elders and animals... cuz kids and animals aren't looking for it, and elders are the closest to finding it.

I don't write comedy. I write drama that's funny.

I love cheetahs. Every moment of every day is spent in fear of dying a terrible death yet they always carry themselves elegantly, remain loyal to their family, and never complain about anything.

I wish dogs understood: 'We're going in five minutes.

Talent is being unabashedly and unapologetically fearless in the work that you do. The only difference between having talent and not having talent is fear.

Stupidity is actually in a way the mark of intelligence - if you're not doing stupid things that defy logic you're probably not taking enough risks.

Out of all the medical advancements in human history I'm still most in awe of that tiny little piece of toilet paper that can stop a gushing razor cut in its tracks.

The door that closed kept us from entering a room, but what now lies before us is the rest of reality.

The curiosity of lazy men is gossip

Graphic design will save the world right after rock and roll does.

Civilization has run on ahead of the soul of man, and is producing faster than he can think and give thanks.

No Jew was ever fool enough to turn Christian unless he was a clever man.

It's true I don't tolerate fools but then they don't tolerate me, so I am spiky. Maybe that's why I'm quite good at playing spiky elderly ladies.

We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves.

I'm just considering myself extremely lucky. All I wanted is to have 'Paranormal Activity' be released and become successful. And everything that's happened since then is just an enormous bonus.

If you work at comedy too laboriously, you can kill what's funny in the joke.

India's place in the sun would come from the partnership between wisdom of its rural people and skill of its professionals