Television contracts the imagination and radio expands it.

There's not enough silliness in the world. Eurovision helps to keep it balanced.

Don't start drinking before the fifth song.

Who knows what hellish future lies ahead? ... Actually, I do. I've seen the rehearsals.

I don't make the mistake of thinking it's a major musical event. I love the Eurovision Song Contest and it will continue long after I'm gone. Just please don't ask me to take it seriously.

The culture now in television is that the presenter calls the financial and, increasingly, the creative shots. It is comparable to what happened in Hollywood 15 or so years ago.

But they're laughing at you. They're not laughing with you.

Worried about a skin condition? Leap smartly into a bath of porridge.

I suppose I should make a little apology to Cyndi - although I'm not taking the blame for this - because I was the one who did say Cyndi had won.

A talk show is about having a look at a famous face, a bit of stand-up comedy, knockabout stuff - an interview is what Barbara Walters or Connie Chung does in the States, in-depth, done properly.

There's nothing to be said for being famous. It's a pain. You can't be rude to people - it's inexcusable not to be nice. Anyway, it's not in my nature. I was trained to be nice.

It's my fault but the most violating thing I've felt this year is not the media exaggerations or the catchy gossip, but the rape of my personal thoughts.

Computers are idiots whose only virtue is that they can count up to two extremely fast.

The genealogy of blessing always traces back to God-ordained risk.

I discovered surfing, which I absolutely fell in love with. That feels good and kind of keeps your body aligned, so does the salt water.

Grace can neither be bought, earned, or won by the creature. If it could be, it would cease to be grace.

They are bringing drugs. They are bringing crime. They are rapists. We need to build a wall.

A careful observation of Nature will disclose pleasantries of superb irony. She has for instance placed toads close to flowers.

I'm never gonna step away from stand-up. I can't. That's what got me where I am, and that's also my muse. That's how I stay level-headed. That's what keeps me going.

The whole dear notion of one's own Self-marvelous old free-willed, free- enterprising, autonomous, independent, isolated island of a Self- is a myth.

I believe everyone should have the freedom to represent what they believe-in in their own way.