Sometimes I wonder if I met everyone in my life in the wrong order.

Male egos require constant stroking. Every task is an achievement, every success epic. That is why women cook, but men are chefs: we make cheese on toast, they produce pain de fromage.

in love: a momentary instance of bein almost interested in someone else as in oneself!

Time is limited and some opportunities never repeat themselves.

Don't ever turn down pleasure because you were afraid of what other people might say.

The name of this book is mysterious.

Trust your instinct in areas you have some background because your instinct is informed and not blind. - L. R. W. Lee

But I love stand-up, and it's where I came from creatively, so it's something I never want to walk away from.

I have nothing to hide. I enjoy being myself. I'm not going to change who I am just because it's Halloween.

The danger lies not in the big ears of little pitchers, but in the large mouths.

I have such a desire to sleep and am so much behind my sleep. A good night, one good night and all this nonsense will be swept away.

The Vice Presidency isn't worth a pitcher of warm spit.

God doesn't want you to be addicted to anything in life except Him.

The words spoken by the leader of the free world can expand the frontiers of freedom or shrink them.

There's a difference between a job and a career - if you're the boss you don't stop at six o'clock, you have to worry about everything all the time.