School was great. There were no boys there, which didn't really bother me at the time because I had two brothers, so I was quite pleased not to spend any more time with boys.

By puberty I learned that nothing worth having could be easily attained and to succeed one must be single minded.

As long as we prioritize material truths over spiritual truths we will live in tyranny because we are living an illusion

You must not feel persecuted and examined. Liberate yourself from the idea that people are watching you.

The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.

People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn't. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare.

I get fixated when I'm bleeding -- I can see why they went in for blood-letting in the medieval times because it makes you feel a bit better. When I cut myself, the drama of it calms me down.

A library doesn't need windows. A library is a window.

There are two types of people in this world: one who opens a packet of biscuits, has one and puts the rest back in the cupboard, and one who eats the whole packet in one go.

The bad-boy label is just an assumption.

There are 10-20 times more male comics than female comics; it's something to do with the social structure of society.

Crying can bring relief, as long as you don't cry alone.

The secret to happiness is low expectations.

Who knows until we experience it? I think that heaven and reincarnation are both ways of making us feel better about what happens to people's souls after death. I hope at least one of them is true.

Choose the things that matter to God. See things as He sees them. Whatever results, that is the best way.

There are fewer and fewer Jews in Ireland, but we still have one of the most famous Jewish characters in literary history, of course, in Leopold Bloom.

I'm confused tell me where we go wrong? I was sure that I would be with you for so long.

The truth for me is that I've been doing independent film since the get-go, so that's a big passion of mine, but the big ones are really fun, too. I like my world to be eclectic.

My day is not that fun-filled or that filled usually with complications.

What's the problem with 'never?' It keeps you from trying. It ensures that you will fail. End of story.

I'm a great believer that saying yes is a lot more fun than saying no.