Real men don't do pickup lines just to sweep off every girls' feet. They do and trust their own instincts knowing what the girls' wants and needs. Vying to win their hearts.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.

The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation.

I was always the last woman on the last down elevator as the store was closing.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.

Some enterprising youth should go from door to door on Christmas morning peddling batteries.

Every suicide is a solution to a problem.

The enemy of learning is knowing.

Damn it, woman, ” he snapped. “Stop crying. Are you hysterical?” “Maybe.” Her voice was muffled by the pillow and her hands.-Maxim & Airiana

A great deal of phenomenal experience has fostered in me a flexibility of the mind and imagination that some might call madness

The Soviet Union has indeed been our greatest menace - not so much because of what it has done, but because of the excuses it has provided us for our own failures.

I was trying to perform as best as possible. I was a boy at the time, but worked well with the sickle.

She that weds well will wisely match her love, Nor be below her husband nor above.

Do not do to others what angers you if done to you by others.

To build your self image, you need to join the smile, firm handshake and compliment club.