No collusion, no obstruction. Comey is a leaker.

Nothing is easy, but who wants nothing?

There's nobody bigger or better at the military than I am.

I am the only one who can make America truly great again!

Sometimes by losing a battle you find a new way to win the war.

Don’t be afraid of being unique. It’s like being afraid of your best self.

I could stand in the middle Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters.

If you're going to be thinking anyway, think big!

Always try to learn from other people's mistakes, not your own- it is much cheaper that way!

Do you mind if I sit back a little? Because your breath is very bad.

This very expensive GLOBAL WARMING bullshit has got to stop. Our planet is freezing, record low temps,and our GW scientists are stuck in ice.

I've still got the bible, I stole that night from my revival. From some hotel on 35.

The people of the world have a fixed destiny. But the spiritually developed receive what is “not” in their destiny.

The common factor in all our experiences is wakeful consciousness which turns what happens into an experience or a meaningful reality.

Put 'going the extra mile' to work as part of one's daily habit

Right and proof are two crutches for everything bent and crooked that limps along.

Once you have mastered a technique, you barely have to look at a recipe again

It is to the eccentrics that the world owes most of its knowledge.

The more sleep you get in before the clock turns midnight, the more rested you feel no matter what time your alarm goes off.

My stand-up is more like how I am in real life. I don't really do a character thing in stand-up. It's just a bunch of sentences that are supposed to be funny.