My father was the king of the joke-tellers. I was so impressed as a child watching him, holding people in rapt attention.

As a writer, the worst thing you can do is work in an environment of fear of rejection.

I suddenly had this really mad desire to have an affair with a woman. I was divorced. I was childless. I figured there's got to be one more way to really tick off my mom.

Time flies, though, huh? But I feel young. And do you know how I stay feeling young, ladies and gentlemen? I'll share my secret with you: I live in a senior citizen retirement community.

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

I was over there in Hawaii. I was there on the big island. The 'Big Island' - that name cracks me up. First of all, it's not that big, so I'm pretty sure a guy came up with that name.

They're all sources of material. What I love about what I do, the more you talk about your life, there are so many people who have similar experiences.

All my other relationships with men, there was so much maneuvering and strategic decisions and stuff.

Women, stop buying the lingerie. Stop buying it right now. Oh, it's a big rip off. Oh my god, $18 bucks for panties this big? Come on, one trip through the dryer, and it's a frilly bookmark.

Just be your authentic self because there's nothing sexier or more beautiful than that.

I'm not afraid of putting myself out there to someone and then them passing on it. At least you could have gotten a 'yes.' So it's worthwhile to have the cojones to do it.

Never give up anything your destiny demands while in search of temporary pleasures.

Philosophy and Art both render the invisible visible by imagination.

I acted like Cary Grant for so long that I became Cary Grant

I want people to know that I am tough on illegal immigration and we are working to provide needed border security.

Black culture has been a huge influence in my life.

He turned out the light and went into Jem's room. He would be there all night, and he would be there when Jem waked up in the morning.

I have to do what's right.

The inner is the foundation of the outer. The still is master of the restless. The Sage travels all day yet never leaves his inner treasure.

We assume, falsely, that how we feel now is how we will feel in the future

You are free to think thoughts of worry or joy, and whatever you choose will attract the same kind back to you. Worry attracts worry. Joy attracts joy.