Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings... and lawyers.

The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.

I ain't no movie star, man. I'm a booty star.

I believe the ability to think is blessed. If you can think about a situation, you can deal with it. The big struggle is to keep your head clear enough to think.

A lie is profanity. A lie is the worst thing in the world. Art is the ability to tell the truth.

Two things people throughout history have had in common are hatred and humour. I am proud that I have been able to use humour to lessen people's hatred.

I'm not addicted to cocaine. I just like the way it smells.

Booty is just a ghetto expression, and I'm just a booty star.

All humor is rooted in pain.

I had some great things and I had some bad things. The best and the worst . . . In other words, I had a life.

If I thought about it, I could be bitter, but I don't feel like being bitter. Being bitter makes you immobile, and there's too much that I still want to do.

I like Aristotle, but I don’t agree with his cosmological argument about god.

Oh yeah, she wanted to be this man's prey in every way. She'd felt his brand of dominance and wanted more of it.

He that despiseth his neighbor sin-neth but he that hath mercy on the poor happy is he.

Grow old with me! The best is yet to be.

Any opinion writer worth his salt would have rejected the quaint notion that certain eternally aggrieved identity groups have exclusive linguistic rights to words in the English language.

The ability to discriminate between that which is true and that which is false is one of the last attainments of the human mind.

Landing the airplane I think is the most difficult thing that I've every learned to do in my life.

I didn't want to write for pay. I wanted to be paid for what I write.

We usually understand freedom as meaning that there are many choices - but does having more choices, or believing we do, actually make us more free?

I pretty much only write by default, because I want to make certain projects so instead of trying to wait and find them, I create them, but I'm not really a writer.