Life is tough, and it's really tough when you're stupid.

She has a laugh so hearty it knocks the whipped cream off an order of strawberry shortcake on a table fifty feet away.

The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

I came to the conclusion long ago that all life is six to five against.

You can keep the things of bronze and stone and give me one man to remember me just once a year.

In my opinion turkey is the most over-rated critter for eating purposes in kingdom come but the most striking example we have of the power of propaganda.

He who tooteth not his own horn, the same shall not be tooted.

In all the history of the boxing game, you'll find no human interest story to compare with the life narrative of James J. Braddock.

Always try to rub up against money, for if you rub up against money long enough, some of it may rub off on you.

He [Will Rogers] was America's most complete human document. One-third humor. One-third humanitarian. One-third heart.

Damon Runyon. A day-coach boy in a parlor car seat.

Sometimes it's not something special we need but doing something extra.

In the end, we serve, the Saviour, who saved us from death to life.

We are taught we can redeem them, she said to me once. We are taught it as soon as we can read. We can turn the beast into a prince, if only we love him enough.

I'm quite certain that if I lost my sense of humor, it would most definitely need to be replaced by a padded cell.

...some of the best love poems have been written by monks and nuns...

If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker.

I deal with foreign countries. I made a lot of money dealing against China. I've made a lot of money dealing against many other countries.

Can I be your only hope? Because your the only hope for me.

Instead of acting in court, I decided to act onstage.

I'd like to get all the colors in the world into one painting