Judd Apatow, Conan O'Brien ... taking what you think is funny, and then adding another layer to it. That's kind of my sensibility. Those are the guys that make me laugh.

You have to do well on third downs.

The worst thing in the world is to feel like people turn on the TV and say, oh god, it's that guy again. I'm trying to avoid that.

I think by its very nature, it's redundant, you know, being the play-by-play guy on television.

Five years ago, I wasn't getting questions [about blogs and the internet] from the TV/radio critic of the New York Times.

And Johnny Manziel is only in a snickers commercial.

If you're the play-by-play announcer, I think it's your job to be better than just saying what's on people's TV screen.

I actually called a touchdown on national TV in the NFL while going to the bathroom.

Every time you see kid and hear kid, you think, man, I have to not sound like a kid.

You know what you gotta do cowboy?

We all fell in love with the young Macaulay Culkin, back in the day

All women are many women! I'm afraid you've never known very much about women.

What do you want from me?" he asked hesitantly."Your trust, " i answered without any hesitation.

Never measure or compare yourself to anyone other than your past self, seek to always improve & you'll be happy and successful.

The problem with books is that they end. They seduce you.[…]You turn the page and there is nothing.

Complaint is the largest tribute Heaven receives.

You have the sun, you have the moon, you have the air that you breathe - and you have the Rolling Stones!

I never use the word nation in speaking of the United States. I always use the word Union or Confederacy. We are not a nation but a union, a confederacy of equal and sovereign States.

I always liked to go to Vancouver to shoot, because I think Vancouver's a beautiful city.

My dear sir, it haunted me for the rest of my life.

I never did anything worth doing entirely by accident. . . Almost none of my inventions came about totally by accident. They were achieved by having trained myself to endure and tolerate hard work.