It was a cheesy cheeseball, covered with Cheez Whiz and served on a bed of Cheez-Its. With a side of queso.

I dove on those papers like Sherlock Holmes on a cappuccino binge.

You look like a handsome young man…although you might want to zip your fly. Mom! What? Should I have not told you and left it for everyone else to notice at the dance?

Instead of agonizing about the things you can't change, why don't you try working on the things you can change

Chicks dig a dude who’s sporting the latest eggplant turtleneck styles.

But nobody ever tells you in advance when you should concentrate on the good times-that's why you're supposed to do it every day.

If you promise you will get better instead of dying, I promise I will, too.

It was like seeing Bill Gates at age thirteen, times two. And half of him was wearing a cheerleader uniform. Yes, I know that’s a weird image.

There are really no guidelines whatsoever, because this is the kind of thing that only happens to ME.

And if there was one thing I'd finally figured out, it was that your mind is something you always CAN change.

Some kids do drugs. Some kids light stuff on fire. Me, I eat oats.

When you pray, you are speaking to yourself. When you take action, you are speaking to God.

I have enough money to get by. I'm not independently wealthy just independently lazy I suppose.

The intention and outcome of vulnerability is trust, intimacy and connection. The outcome of oversharing is distrust, disconnection - and usually a little judgment.

At college I'd seen my dead frog's limbs twitch under some applied stimulus or other - seen, but hadn't believed. Didn't dream of thinking beyond or around what I saw.

As paredes tem ouvidos. (Portuguese: The walls have ears.)

Truly, if faith is there, the believer cannot hold back... he breaks out into good works.

I'm not actually teaching any more, but I am writing pieces for schools all the time, and for kids.

What unites us, is much greater than what divides us.

I very much faced my mother's death with hard, arduous and time-consuming labor. The more I would do, the less I would feel.

Congratulations to Prince Charles for banning foie gras from all his functions.