Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

History, Stephen said, is a nightmare from which I am trying to awake.

Every man had his personal habits, passions, and impulses toward goodness, beauty, and truth.

It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is nothing if the audience is deaf.

I'm very lighthearted, outgoing, friendly, and funny, so I like to try new things.

That's how I like to do it with actors, have them really go for it and I'll tell them when it's too much. It's always easier to bring it back then to push it further.

The three most important pitches I threw in my life were all fastballs.

The Internet is the greatest tool for any artist to have interaction with any audience.

We live, I regret to say, in an age of Big Data hype.

Sleeping is the height of genius

I look at a picture like Scarecrow and think, 'Jesus, how could they have let us make that?' I mean, if you used technology that old nowadays, it would look like old Hollywood.