I like my money right where I can see it... hanging in my closet.

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.

As we speed along this endless road to the destination called who we hope to be, I can't help but whine, 'Are we there yet?'.

I don't believe in email. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up.

Follow your instincts and do not let other people's opinion of you become your opinion of yourself.

It's like the riddle of the Sphinx... why are there so many great unmarried women, and no great unmarried men?

Balls are to men what purses are to women.

After all, computers crash, people die, relationships fall apart. The best we can do is breath and reboot.

People go to casinos for the same reason they go on blind dates - hoping to hit the jackpot. But mostly, you just wind up broke or alone in a bar.

I got to thinking about relationships and partial lobotomies. Two seemingly different ideas that might just be perfect together - like chocolate and peanut butter.

To build up a library is to create a life. It's never just a random collection of books.

We are stimulated to emotional response, not by works that confirm our sense of the world, but by works that challenge it.

I respect everybody, but at the same time, I carry myself with an aura that demands respect, too.

If you always start with the worst hand, you never have a bad-beat story to tell.

I'll admit - I was honored to be on the cover of Time

A lot of people have this live or die attitude with mediation. It has to be all or nothing. I don't think it should be. It's a study that you follow for the rest of your life.

When I hit Ctrl-Alt-Delete, I see that the System Idle Process is hogging all the resources and chewing up 95 percent of the processor's cycles. Doing what? Doing nothing?

When they come for your guns, give them the ammo first.

Life without music is meaningless, music without life is academic.