I know that he, Matthew Broderick, doesn't have his laundry done, and that he hasn't had a hot meal in days. That stuff weighs on my mind.

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.

As we speed along this endless road to the destination called who we hope to be, I can't help but whine, 'Are we there yet?'.

I don't believe in email. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up.

Follow your instincts and do not let other people's opinion of you become your opinion of yourself.

It's like the riddle of the Sphinx... why are there so many great unmarried women, and no great unmarried men?

Balls are to men what purses are to women.

After all, computers crash, people die, relationships fall apart. The best we can do is breath and reboot.

People go to casinos for the same reason they go on blind dates - hoping to hit the jackpot. But mostly, you just wind up broke or alone in a bar.

I got to thinking about relationships and partial lobotomies. Two seemingly different ideas that might just be perfect together - like chocolate and peanut butter.

But we were different now. I wanted only his pain, and judging from the girl he’d come home with last night, Madoc was still the same. A user.

When God opens a new page in your life, make photocopies of it, read it and share it with other people. Some may hear it when you read it, others may tear it when you share it.

[A]s a parent you just have no idea what anything means. On some level everything your kids do and say is in code.

Pop art is the inedible raised to the unspeakable.

There are so many selves in everybody, and just to explore and exploit one is wrong, dead wrong, for the creative person.

I think of myself as more of a lover rather than a fighter, but sometimes you have to fight for what you love.

If you want to see how enlightened you are, go spend a week with your family.

By the time you get dressed, drive out there, play 18 holes and come home, you've blown seven hours. There are better things you can do with your time.

We go, in winter's biting wind, On many a short-lived winter day, With aching back but willing mind To dig and double dig the clay.

Strange, (is it not?) that battles, martyrs, blood, even assassination should so condense - perhaps only really lastingly condense - a Nationality.