I don’t think of myself as being a celebrity, it’s too mortifying. I have a hard time watching myself on screen and it’s getting worse. I can’t tell whether my work is good or not.

I think everybody's weird. We should all celebrate our individuality and not be embarrassed or ashamed of it.

if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second.

The only creatures that are evolved enough to convey pure love are dogs and infants.

Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate

We don't always cry because we are weak, sometimes we cry because we have been strong, brave and courageous for way too long.

I'm having too much fun today to worry about tomorrow.

People cry, not because they're weak. It's because they've been strong for too long.

When kids hit one year old, it's like hanging out with a miniature drunk. You have to hold onto them. They bump into things. They laugh and cry. They urinate. They vomit.

If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.

I was ecstatic they re-named 'French Fries' as 'Freedom Fries'. Grown men and women in positions of power in the U.S. government showing themselves as idiots.

True laziness is the commitment to decrease work and increase efficiency

Zookeeper foible #1: Tendency to not equate fur and scale with fracture and scar.

Give space to life. Give time to sprout your potential - the potential to awaken the beauty in you. Awaken the beauty of your heart - the beauty of your spirit. There are infinite possibilities.

Give the children love, more love and still more love – and the common sense will come by itself.

I hope something happens. I'm restless as the devil and have a horror of getting fat or falling in love and growing domestic.

I love insult, it's always honest.

When you exist in the centre of a debate, as a topic, a hypothesis - otherised and stigmatised - you become the prop in a proposition.

The potential of your body is endless.

People tend to overestimate my character," I say quietly. "They think that because I'm small, or a girl, or a Stiff, I can't possibly be cruel. But they're wrong.