I am not so lost in lexicography as to forget that words are the daughters of earth, and that things are the sons of heaven.

Cucumber should be well sliced, dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out.

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.

Curiosity is one of the most permanent and certain characteristics of a vigorous intellect.

Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not.

When a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind wonderfully.

Classical quotation is the parole of literary men all over the world.

A man who uses a great many words to express his meaning is like a bad marksman who, instead of aiming a single stone at an object, takes up a handful and throws at it in hopes he may hit.

There are minds so impatient of inferiority that their gratitude is a species of revenge, and they return benefits, not because recompense is a pleasure, but because obligation is a pain.

When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford.

He who has so little knowledge of human nature as to seek happiness by changing anything but his own disposition will waste his life in fruitless efforts.

Once we get to know where and why the skeletons of the past are buried, we can start wading across our muddled memories into the open plains of a new horizon. ("Going back to yesterday")

The whiskey kicked like a mugger.

Facts are a strange thing . . . when you know the facts to be true, they turn you into a revolutionary.

Friendship, I fancy, means one heart between two.

You know, I'm going to start thanking the woman who cleans the restroom in the building I work in. I'm going to start thinking of her as a human being.

See now, how men lay blame upon us gods for what is after all nothing but their own folly.

It is in the American tradition to stand up for one's rights--even if the new way to stand up for one's rights is to sit down.

Metaphors convince at once or not at all.

Some people say I’m a dreamer, others say, 'If you fall asleep at work again we’re going to have to let you go'.

Little girls think it's necessary to put all their business on MySpace and Facebook, and I think it's a shame...I'm all about mystery.