Greatness has nothing to do with diversity, skin color, race, ethnicity, nothing to do with it.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

It was deeply a part of Lee's kindness and understanding that man's right to kill himself is inviolable, but sometimes a friend can make it unnecessary

...but as his father used to say when he had a few drinks taken, you couldn't expect bloody miracles when you were talking about God.

Sometimes Death lurks after them for days, weeks, or even months, waiting for their time... Sometimes it doesn’t, and I’ve often raced that omnipresent Reaper to one portion of its work.

Expansion (both far and wide) is the order of the day

The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to be able to quote another's wit.

No other form of violence is legitimate. It is never acceptable to use violence to solve a problem. Whether personal or political.

Painting is so close, so personal, so immediate, and so ordinary... It is the ordinary resurrections that define your painting.

Noting all these things with the great delight which learning gives, we cannot but be stirred by these discoveries when we reflect upon the influence of them one by one.

A Dalit needs Jupiter's escape velocity to achieve success.

Writing books is fun because after I do a show for a couple hours, I'm in a bus for 22 hours. It's not hard for me to look out the window and tell a joke here and there.