Annette had kissed me. Who would’a thunk it?

I dove on those papers like Sherlock Holmes on a cappuccino binge.

You look like a handsome young man…although you might want to zip your fly. Mom! What? Should I have not told you and left it for everyone else to notice at the dance?

Instead of agonizing about the things you can't change, why don't you try working on the things you can change

Chicks dig a dude who’s sporting the latest eggplant turtleneck styles.

But nobody ever tells you in advance when you should concentrate on the good times-that's why you're supposed to do it every day.

If you promise you will get better instead of dying, I promise I will, too.

It was like seeing Bill Gates at age thirteen, times two. And half of him was wearing a cheerleader uniform. Yes, I know that’s a weird image.

There are really no guidelines whatsoever, because this is the kind of thing that only happens to ME.

And if there was one thing I'd finally figured out, it was that your mind is something you always CAN change.

Some kids do drugs. Some kids light stuff on fire. Me, I eat oats.

Being real is being true to you.

Not all vampires are created equal, you know.

I don't know anything about propaganda for Chinese reunification. I only know about charity and environmental work. I just want to do good.

Books should, not Business, entertain the Light; And Sleep, as undisturb'd as Death, the Night.

We need an employer verification system that works so that we can hold employers accountable.

If worms carried pistols, birds wouldn't eat 'em.

War is sweet to those who haven't tasted it. Dulce bellum inexpertis.

After 30 years I have realized the greatest pleasure I can get is to have learnt.

Hope will lie to you, but lust is what it is; it never lies.

Looking down at the Earth, you started to pick up a sense of speed much more than I had noticed on orbit.