A smart woman knows when to listen to her man." Her man? "He is most definitely not my man. He's not my type." "Type? If he was any more your type, he'd have you sitting in his lap.

Take me inside. Show me if a fireman knows how to start a fire.

She tugged on his hair. "I'll have you know I'm no weakling." He grinned and kissed her forehead. "No, it takes a strong woman to kill a truck.

The only true thing is what's in front of you right now.

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident a tight girdle a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.

Well, I wish some of you would tell me the brand of whiskey that Grant drinks. I would like to send a barrel of it to my other generals.

True freedom is not the liberty to do anything we please, but the liberty to do what we ought; and it is genuine liberty because doing what we ought now pleases us

An interesting play cannot in the nature of things mean anything but a play in which problems of conduct and character of personalimportance to the audience are raised and suggestively discussed.

The environmental movement could do a better job incorporating the message about the connection between poverty and environmental degradation, and building that message at the grassroots level.

I do have a lot of female friends who are stand-ups and also women who are actresses and also happen to have an act.

I get paid to make out with the hunks!

The happier the moment the shorter.

In poetry, only emotion endures.