Was anything in the world truer than that intuitive leap of the heart?

At the risk of appearing disingenuous, I don't really think of myself as 'writing humor.' I'm simply reporting on the world I observe, which is frequently hilarious.

And there comes a time in your life when you realize that if you don't take the opportunity to be happy, you may never get another chance again.

People sometimes get in the habit of being loyal to a mistake.

You use simple brushstrokes in a screenplay for things over which you would take much greater pains in a novel.

Have you ever noticed that when people use the expression 'I have to say', what follows usually needn't be said?

What if all everybody needed in the world was to be sure of one friend? What if you were the one, and you refused to say those simple words?

My books are elegiac in the sense that they're odes to a nation that even I sometimes think may not exist anymore except in my memory and my imagination.

Worse, I have to admit to feeling the jealousy of one crab for another that has managed to climb out of the barrel.

Bookstores, like libraries, are the physical manifestation of the wide world's longest, most thrilling conversation.

I was the one who did come through that door. You were the one she was waiting for.

People say to me, 'Has being a woman helped or hindered your career?' And the answer is yes.

You need a good bedside manner with doctors or you will get nowhere.

When you wear a bow tie, doors open for you.

I design genetic algorithms, neural network and artificial intelligence systems.

It is amazing how much a thought expands and refines by being put into speech: I should think it could hardly know itself.

When Donald Trump becomes president, he'll fly on a jumbo jet rebadged Hair Force One. It will be oversized to contain his massive ego, and will have all the latest and greatest blowdryer technology.

Some players you pat their butts, some players you kick their butts, some players you leave alone.

Nature, or the world, or reality, is what mythology is all about.

Americans need to worry about whether Donald Trump will be watching out for America's bottom line or his own bottom line.

I felt probably more uncomfortable than Beyonce. But I can't answer for her.