The more I know about people, the more I love zombies.

A man’s principles are his own. Man starts flip-flopping on what he believes based on outside influences and he may as well run for congress.

Dude--she's your wife." He pointed to the locker where the Bible lay concealed. "God first, family second, country third.

It amazed me how quickly a lie loses its power in the face of truth.

Sometimes I feel like I'm a contestant in a reality show that probably would be called The Apprentice Survivor Millionaire.

I don't know if I'll ever accomplish most of my dreams - I have so many.

If there be a God and one has never sought him, it will be small consolation to remember that one could not get proof of his existence.

I'm not saying all seniors should be running a city or running a business, but I am saying seniors are good for a lot more than simply running a bath, baking cookies or babysitting grandchildren.

Always ask for the truth. Just make sure the time is right.

Characters paralyzed by the meaninglessness of modern life still have to drink water from time to time.

Sociological prose can tell you everything, but it can't point out the grief.

I consider myself a sit-down comedian really, as much as anything else. I love comedy. Life is a cosmic joke.