Shuffling really isn't something you should be doing on your deathbed.

I don't chase after things, but I put forward the effort and know the rest of it is out of my hands.

I don't necessarily self-identify as a writer, 'cause it implies a certain level of intelligence.

The thing about narcissistic people is that they don't think they're being narcissistic.

Your harshest critic is always going to be yourself. Don't ignore that critic, but don't give it more attention than it deserves.

I take my coffee like I take my women... strong... black... and proud.

Internet fame is like regular fame only without all the annoying 'money' and 'power.'

Super excited about things I'm going to do; never excited about things I'm actually doing.

You have to lead, in the case of a game show, a contestant through the architecture of the show. So there's a lot of rules there, literal and implied, that you have to navigate.

Whatever I write I publish. Because that's where the money is.

I don't watch that much comedy. I think it's professional jealousy. That and a lack of support for my community.

Adventures are what happens when an event is flawed, a mark of imperfection.

... On the whole, the best fortress you can have, is in not being hated by your subjects. If they hate you no fortress will save you...

The Internet, and Google, and everything that goes along with that is awesome for some things, but not so awesome for other things. Because everything gets leaked nowadays.

Make the best use of both time and money. Add industry and frugal dealings if they pay very well and if you're free to it.

If it was a sin for you to choose me . . . then I would go to the Devil himself and bless him for tempting ye to it.

String theory is 21 st century physics that fell accidentally into the 20th century.

I believe destiny and hard work go hand in hand.

Hapscomb's Texaco sat on Number 93 just north of Arnette, a pissant four-street burg about 110 miles from Houston.

The only people without problems are those in cemeteries.

I sing the body electric.