Nothing more rapidly inclines a person to go into a monastery than reading a book on etiquette. There are so many trivial ways in which it is possible to commit some social sin.

Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses.

I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds.

Posing was the first job I did in which I understood what I was doing.

In an expanding universe, time is on the side of the outcast.

Fashion is what you adopt when you don't know who you are.

My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.

The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as 'Soho' poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent.

Vice is its own reward.

Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.

No effort is required to define or even attain happiness, but enormous concentration is needed to abandon everything else.

What you see is not true, but what you think about what you see is the truth.

If you're under stress, your life is complex. Simplify your life to reduce the stress.

‎I have panicked unnecessarily in all four corners of the globe.

Could I please amend that suggestion? Could you not be there in the second darkest shadow one hour before midnight, to see who steps into the darkest shadow?

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.

Never the grave gives back what it has won!

I've experienced the highest of highs and lowest of lows. I think to really appreciate anything you have to be at both ends of the spectrum.

Children take in more information than we'd like to believe.

Slander, whose whisper over the world's diameter, as level as the cannon to its blank, transports its poisoned shot.