New Orleans is just a doggone fun place to be.

Sometimes you gotta mess up a little bit to wake up

Deep inside, we're still the boys of autumn, that magic time of the year that once swept us onto America's fields.

I wish I’d played my whole career in flag football.

If experience is the best teacher, there's nothing that comes close to the experience of life.

If television's a babysitter, the Internet is a drunk librarian who won't shut up.

We must think ourselves empty when coming to the text of scripture and read ourselves full.

I've learned that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I do not criticize people who take a public stand on human rights issues. I express my respect for them. But some people are more influential without a public confrontation.

Partly I was honing my self-consciousness into a torture device, sharp and efficient enough to last me the rest of my life.

Every people, like every person, . . . has a right to be itself.

Why should I be feeling tension? It's The Daily Show.

Make it a policy to know your net worth to the penny.

Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'