Massage is the only form of physical pleasure to which nature forgot to attach consequences.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

I used my history degree about twice a year whether I needed to or not.

Life is beautiful in all its colors, even the darker ones, they’re here for a reason.

Foods are like men: some are good, some are bad, and some are okay only in small doses. But most should be tried at least once.

True charity is liable to excesses and transports.

As a musician, you never understand why people connect with certain songs.

The pleasures of the palate deal with us like Egyptian thieves who strangle those whom they embrace.

The shamrock is a religious symbol. St. Patrick said the leaves represented the trinity: the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. That's why four leaf clovers are so lucky, you get a bonus Jesus.

Women become breadwinners, men become caregivers. That's the birth of intimate marriage.

The best indicator of a sociopath serial bully is not a clinical diagnosis but the trail of devastation and destruction of lives and livelihoods surrounding this individual throughout their life.

a young woman in love always looks like patience on a monument smiling at grief