It was not a triumphal return. Home, as I had known it, was gone.

Who embalms the Undertaker when he dies?

How Horrid" has a slightly facetious tone that strikes me as Wildean. It appears to embrace the actual horror--puberty, public disgrace--then at the last second nimbly sidesteps it, laughing.

Don't waste hate on pink geranium.

I try to look cute all the time.

The symbol of all art is the Prism. The goal is unrealism. The method is destructive. To break up the white light of objective realism, into the secret glories which it contains.

I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

Someone on the internet referred to me as 'that horrible little man who's replacing Rob Lowe', which is hurtful, because I think of myself as a delightful little man.

Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did.

Great men are but life-sized. Most of them, indeed, are rather short.

Confidence breeds confidence and negativity breeds negativity. Treat those around you with respect and dignity and they will thrive.

This is bravery: using the challenge of daily life to sharpen our mind and open our heart.

Saving the world happens one person at a time. Be at the front of the queue.