I was in the game for love. After all, where else can an old-timer with one leg, who can't hear or see, live like a king while doing the only thing I wanted to do?

The true harbinger of spring is not crocuses or swallows returning to Capistrano, but the sound of the bat on the ball.

There are only two seasons - winter and Baseball.

Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off.

I try not to break the rules, but merely to test their elasticity.

If there is any justice in this world, to be a White Sox fan frees a man from any other form of penance.

Tradition is the albatross around the neck of progress.

The most beautiful thing in the world is a ballpark filled with people.

I have discovered in 20 years of moving around a ballpark, that the knowledge of the game is usually in inverse proportion to the price of the seats.

I'm for the dreamers. The only really important things in history have been started by the dreamers. They never know what can't be done.

How can you be a sage if you're pretty? You can't get your wizard papers without wrinkles.

When people say "If I only knew then what I know now" makes me wonder why they aren't using that wisdom now.

I just don't see the point of not eating cheese. I mean, if God didn't want us to eat cheese, would he have let man invent it?

Who needs drugs when you have Takeshi's Castle?

School integration did not come to be the day after the Brown ruling was issued. Progress took years, and it took passion, strength, and courage from a large group of committed individuals.

I know it's a cliche, but trust me on this. I once dated a Canadian. Canada = boring.

I like to be who I am.

In this loveless everyday life eroticism is a substitute for love.

A hot dog at the game beats roast beef at the Ritz.

The goal is progress, not perfection!

Death is not the enemy; living in constant fear of it is.