I love Nashville. I've been here so many times... oh man, I would stay here for a year if I could. It's just so much fun.

Don't keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason.

Thank you, people who say 'Wow, you're really photogenic,' for not saying what you really mean: 'Wow, you're really ugly in person.'

Thank you... fantasy football draft, for letting me know that even in my fantasies, I am bad at sports.

In New York, there are so many potholes, they're like craters on the moon. That's another traffic thing.

The man who invented Doritos has passed away at the age of 97. He asked to be buried with the creator of Fritos and Cheetos in a variety pack.

I just really don't like being the center of attention that much. It's kind of ironic.

If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice.

I know what you want. And I know what you need. But I'm gonna screw it up, yeah, cause I'm an idiot. And I'm your boyfriend.

Researches at Yale found a connection between brain cancer and work environment. The No. 1 most dangerous job for developing brain cancer? Plutonium hat model.

I don't shoot guns. I don't know how to do that. I grew Upstate New York, so I fought with my fists.

The hunger to know is the hope of search.

What are you seeking? Spiritual Health or Monetary Wealth? While the latter will dissolve, the former will make you evolve!

The home is the chief school of human virtues.

Life is not about having perfect days. Life is not about handling days perfectly. Life is about perfecting one’s character through the having and handling of every given day.

Jesus Christ gives strength.

The principle of recognition of evil under all its guises is at the basis of the true education of man.

Sometimes I think too much fuss is made about marriage. Century after century of carnal embracement and we're still no nearer to understanding one another.

to leap is not only to leap, it is to hit the ground somewhere.

I always say that pain is information, that it is not punishment.

We need to learn to get along with each other and learn how to help one another.