I don't think that my kind of journalism has ever been universally popular. It's lonely out here.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

History is the interpretation of the significance that the past has for us.

I like the tragedies way more than the comedies because they're so universal.

If somebody crafts an interesting tweet that’ll lead me to their blog, I’m going to their blog.

How am I going to listen to that horrible noise I make without a gram of coke and a couple of double Jack Daniels?

When a man has written a role for you that you admire, the expectations are higher.

In my case, adulthood itself was not an advance, although it was a useful waymark.

I think I have a pattern of nice and lovely and then dark and twisted.

A critic without a good eye is a eunuch in a harem.

I can't promise results, but I can promise a common destiny.

The strategy behind the Kyoto Protocol has no grounding in economics or environmental policy.