His older self had taught his younger self a language which the older self knew because the younger self, after being taught, grew up to be the older self and was, therefore, capable of teaching.

If a grasshopper tries to fight a lawnmower, one may admire his courage but not his judgement.

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

I never learned from a man who agreed with me.

A generation which ignores history has no past — and no future.

Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events.

May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.

I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research.

We don't always get what we want. And sometimes, when we do, it's not worth the price.

Though sleep is called our best friend, it is a friend who often keeps us waiting!

What is a child? Ignorance. What is a child? Want of instruction.

Man, be he who he may, experiences a last piece of good fortune and a last day. [Ger., Der Mensch erfahrt, er sei auch wer er mag, Ein letztes Gluck und einen letzten Tag.]

If you're more than three feet away from a housefly, it can't see you.

I can't imagine a pain more all-encompassing than losing a child.

Politics without principles, Education without character, Science without humanity, and Commerce without morality are not only useless, but also positively dangerous.

I hate it when people come up to me on trains and ask 'Are you Soulja Boy?' If people want pictures or autographs, that's cool, but I don't like the dumb questions.

I have been maturing as a teacher.