Don't think of it as wrinkles. Think of ot as relaxed-fit skin.

You can never be too paranoid.

What women look for in a man: Breathing, IQ over 80, weight under 550 pounds, fewer than six ex-wives. What men look for in a woman: Pia Zadora as she was ten years ago.

A period is just the beginning of a lifelong sentence

When you want something you've never had, you have to do something you've never done.

Our relations with the other powers of Europe have experienced no essential change since the last session.

I'm not a saint. I'm not an angel. I'm a human being.

There's nothing better when something comes and hits you and you think 'YES'!

Believe me - I've done very good stuff and very crazy stuff, and I don't regret the crazy stuff.

Chloe?" "Yeah?" "I'd be worth the inhaler," he said, then forced himself to walk away.

Cash-for-Clunkers program was a stupid idea.

It started with a simple ring, You became husband and wife, You progressed to being parents And you're still best friends for life.

I lose and find myself in the long water. I am gathered together once more.

You must not change one thing, one pebble, one grain of sand, until you know what good and evil will follow on that act.