Don’t discount that part of who he was just because you didn’t know it. None of us are all of who we are to any one person.

Engrave this in your brain: EVERY WRITER GETS REJECTED. You will be no different.

If you want me to treat your ideas with more respect, get some better ideas.

I am not responsible for actions of the imaginary version of me you have inside your head.

I didn't mind getting old when I was young. It's the being old now that's getting to me.

Part of what makes us human is what we mean to other people, and what people mean to us.

I thought I saw him once, but it turned out to be a yeti

There's a difference between the fact that the universe is inherently unfair on a cosmic level, and the fact that life is unfair because people are actively making it so.

When you're a teenager and you're in love, it's obvious to everyone but you and the person you're in love with.

Christianity is a fine religion and I wish more Christians practiced it.

You would rather face a life without me than to have me choose a life I would not choose for myself.

[T]his is the strongest encouragement to them in sinning

This is a perfect pair - he's a hypochondriac and she's a pill.

Maybe someday you will understand, that something for nothing is everybody's plan.

Francois Rabelais. He was a poet. And his last words were "I go to seek a Great Perhaps." That's why I'm going. So I don't have to wait until I die to start seeking a Great Perhaps.

Faith is not a reliable path to the truth.

If I had a dog that was sick as often as you are, I'd put it down," he observed kindly.

Education turns an empty mind into an open mind. It turns information into behavioural transformation

It's just as hard staying happily married as it is doing movies.

I think the word 'pregnant' is funny.